Contention. In even the slightest way. I didn't use to be like this, not at all. I loved to debate about things. As long as it wasn't religion. I used to find things to argue about with my sisters. I would jump into arguments to defend what I thought was the "right" side. Anyway, I can't stand it. Even if it is just a "discussion" about opposing opinions.
I apologize if it offends people when I try to move off topic.
The thing is, is that conversations like that have no other purpose than trying to make the other side see your point. And while that can be very insightful, it can also just lead to an unending banter. Not that either side is "right" per se, it's just that it can't come to a conclusion. Nothing is "solved". Hooray, you're opponent understands that you feel the way you do, but you know what? You'd feel that way and your opponent could understand that, with or without the "discussion" contentiously held.
Don't get me wrong, I love to learn about new ideas and technologies and things, but I don't like debating about them. Why? Because it comes down to opinion. If I don't like something after I've studied it out and learned all I can about it, I'm not likely to change my mind. Maybe that's just me being "ignorant" as some people would say, or maybe it's the fact that I am entitled to my own opinion.
I do hate it. A lot. Most people don't see it the same way I do, but I feel that if someone has to defend themselves or a certain idea, if they feel like it is being attacked, it's time to move on.
Again, I apologize if my definition of contention offends anyone. Heaven forbid I try to lessen the contention in my home.
I'm sorry if me being the way I am bugs you. However, I am who I am. I'll try to act more like you whenever I'm around you... but until then, make sure to live what you preach missy. If anyone was or is being contentious then or now is just you. Self-righteousness is not the answer.
ReplyDeleteLOL! Don't know who Dan is... Lol! But hopefully you weren't referring to him, he sounds pretty guilty to me! LOL! And I can say this all while laughing safely from England, because I too have learned how to curb my contentious tendancies...! LOL!
ReplyDeleteAnd now as I'm a writer, I find the slightest raised level of noise at all, disturbing. It's true, we yell less around the house, the volume on the TV is down and we even speak quieter. This is saying a lot for a wildy, crazy, fun family of 8--as you know! But because I'm channelling my stories around 70% of my day, i'm constantly in tune with the spirit and it leaves a lot less ability for me to freak out and lose it like I used to.
Hang in there. I like this post. ALSO, nothing drives someone who is ready for a fight more crazy than if you just agree and walk away. "That's right! You're right! No, no.. I completely agree with you!" If say it with a smile and a raise of your eyebrows (it's all in the delivery) they feel like an idiot. LOL!
Wow, how old is this Dan character...? Anyway, there are always going to be people that will be different from you. Finding a way to deal with them charitably is hard, but the best thing to do. Especially if they resist it. Try to be charitable and not so defensive (or offensive) if you can.
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