Do you ever have days that just don't go your way? Days that kind of smack you in the face and then all of a sudden you're on the ground and you don't really know all the events that led you there? Yes, I do too. Yesterday was one of them. But not for nothing. Let me explain.
There are moments in my life that I look back on and feel guilty about. I look back and think, "Thank Heavens I am not the same person." I look back and cringe at how stubborn, proud, angry and hurt I was over this particular circumstance. I look back and wish I could've changed the way I handled the situation. I think the hardest thing about it all is that it didn't just effect me. I hurt someone else in the process, someone I cared about very much...and, admittedly, still care for. But nothing comes from living in the past, only learning from it. I just hope that I'm not too late to make things better again. So, why was yesterday so hard? Because those feelings were brought back to the surface in a very blunt way. I won't go into details just know it wasn't easy to look back and see how awful I had been.
But you know what? I am so happy that I can look back on my life and say, "Thank heavens I am not the same girl I was two years ago" because in all honesty I am so much better for it. If a person can't look back on their life and see change, growth, mistakes then they haven't grown up, matured and learned much, if anything. I'm not perfect and I do have things in my past that I regret but I have learned. I have grown up, I'm still growing up. There's nothing wrong with that.
In all reality, I have changed. It's been painful and scary but I wouldn't want to be the same person I was two and a half years ago! So while learning from the past is hard sometimes, I'm so happy that I have.
No comments:
Post a Comment