The Interview

I don't like interviews.

"When I quitted Barton last...No, I must go further back."

(Ten points if you can name that movie!)

Let's start at the very beginning, a very good place to start. 

(It's stuck in your head now isn't it!?)

So, once upon a time, there was a President named Obama. He decided to "reform" the American health care system.

Barf. 

Thanks to the ACA, "Affordable Care Act" aka "Obama Care" all the rules regarding my employment have changed. And it ain't pretty people. 

One of the Act's "affordable" rules states that any individual working an average of 30 hours or more in any 52 week period is required to be provided insurance benefits by their employer. Well, I work at BYU and BYU is essential RUN by part time student employees.

BYU can't afford to pay all of their student employees benefits. That would be THOUSANDS of students. I work 20 hours a week during school and 40 hours a week during the spring and summer. For a couple of months now, that 40 hours a week during summer was being threatened.Rumors that only 29 hours/week would be allowed were floating around...

This is no bueno for my family's budget. NO BUENO!!

Because of this I decided to find a second job. 

I interviewed for a Account Support specialist for Vivint. 

I got the job...and then I didn't. 

I got a phone call explaining that all the paper work was ready to go for me and then something happened within the company and someone else, who was already affiliated with Vivint was placed in the spot I was being hired for. 

The guy I interviewed with told me that they were a call away form hiring me, they were very impressed with my qualifications and that he was super upset that there wasn't a place for me on his team. He also told me that, if it was okay with me, he would keep my info on file and contact me when another position becomes available. He said I wouldn't have to interview again but that I'd just get the job.

If I had been hired, I would have worked 55 hours or more every week during the summer. That would make taking vacations hard.

Anyway, the good news is that everything has been ironed out for BYU and I will be working 40 hours a week for BYU but I have to be careful about the hours.

Our Friends The Robertsons

Sometimes you meet people in life that are okay but don't become forever friends. 

But some times there are people you meet and they are fun and funny and nice and accommodating and friendly and THEY become forever friends. 

That would be the case for our good friends, The Robertsons. 

The night before Neil and I got married, my Mom and Dad sat down with the two of us for a chat. One thing they said was, "Find couple friends. Friends that you both get along with." 

AND WE DID!!

The Robertson Family moved into the area around Christmas time last year. Neil and I met them at the Church Christmas Dinner/Talent Show. One day I was thinking and felt prompted to invite them over for dinner. 

And just like that we became friends. 

We basically spend as much time with them as we can. 

We've been on a little road trip together. 

We go on hikes/walks together.

We do laundry together. 

We eat together. 

Pizza is probably our go to dinner. LOVE the chicken pesto pizza.

We do bonfires together. 

We watch A LOT of Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman and other shows/movies.

We help each other with car problems. (Okay, they really help us because our car is the one with issues...)

We girls to crafts together and the boys do homework.

We basically just have a lot of fun with each other and I am SUPER sad that they are moving to Washington for 13 weeks. It's gonna be a long lonely summer. Here are some pics!! (KM, I hope you're okay that I totally stole these from your blog!)

Crafts and Chevron

There are a few things that I know:

1-Some people hate the whole "Chevron" thing. But not me.
2-Knowing how to sew in a straight line can help you do a LOT of cool things
3-I'm obsessed with Pinterest and all the tutorials I can find there.

March was kind of crazy in my house and I needed some sanity. So, I made time to craft. I don't know exactly when the "craft" bug hit me but it has. Hard.

Anyway, I made pillow cases and a laptop sleeve.

Here are the pics:

It's missing the velcro.

I found the pillow case tutorial on Pinterest (duh) and it was SUPER EASY!
I can't find the actual one I used because oddly enough I didn't re-pin it. Weird. But I found one that is essentially the same. You can go here to see it.

I had to do a LOT of Google-ing to find the tutorial for the laptop sleeve. I had to search for a good one because I don't do buttons just yet and so I needed one that was easily adapted to accommodate velcro.This project was just a little bit daunting to me but I did it. In fact, I made two because the first one was just about 1/2 an inch too small. You can go here to see the tutorial.

It's A Really Good Thing I Take Pictures Sometimes...

Why?

Because when I don't blog often enough, I forget what I've done but the pictures help me to remember.

March was the craziest, busiest, sleepiest month Neil and I have had in school. I even lost my "running" streak. Bummer. 

But all is well. BYU doesn't have a Spring Break which I love and hate at the same time. I hate it because it makes March a blasted busy month, but I love it because it means that there are only 6 more days of school left. 

BOO YEAH. 

Anyway, here is a March Update:

We celebrated Neil's Birthday with a movie and dinner. 

We spent LOTS of time, as much as we could with our good friend's the R's. (They're gonna have a post all to themselves!!)
We went to an Orchestra at Temple Square concert.

I filled out a March Madness bracket for work. (I didn't get very many right but I do have Louisville taking the whole thing! I'm hoping! Tonight is the big game...)

We went have shamrock shaped Ravioli for St. Patrick's Day

We made gifts to give away for St. Patrick's Day


I made time to be crafty. (I'll have another post for these too!)

Pillow Cases

Laptop Sleeve

We celebrated "Pi" day.

We celebrated National Pancake Day

We had a bonfire that failed so we used our backup plan-a gas stove.

I had a job interview for a second job. (Also, another post all together.)

 We got to go to a Natalie MacMaster Concer. It. Was. AWESOME!!!

We went to a Palm Sunday Mass at the Cathedral of the Madeline in Salt Lake City

We saw Wreck-It Ralph on a date.
We dyed/Sharpie-d eggs for Easter

There was a lot of stuff in between everything which made for a hectic, crazy, busy month. 

But it was good for us. 

Reflection

I don't mean to be pessimistic or fish or compliments.

I think I just need to vent. 

I have realized lately that I am hard on myself. Harder than I should be, I think. 

Why?

Because there is never enough.

Never enough time, never enough money, never enough sleep...

I don't personally possess enough.

Never enough beauty, never enough smarts, never enough patience...

I feel as though it is my responsibility to fix that. 

I should be able to be super woman. Have a house, clean, sorted and folded laundry, the perfect smile, the best scheduling balancing act, a car that doesn't squeal and wake up the entire neighborhood, have (at least) a 3.8 GPA, and a job that brings in just the right amount of money.

Sometimes I look at my life and I assess where I am and where I feel that I should be. 

I often find myself consumed by my short comings and imperfections. I nitpick and compare and it all just makes me want to give up and cut myself off from it all, quit school, quit my job, hide out in my room and only talk to Neil. Ever. 

You have to understand that knowing and believing are completely different things. I may know that everything I just mentioned isn't true. I may know my worth is of a higher value but right now it is hard to belive the good things. Does that makes sense? It almost seems as though if I admit, in writing, that I am not always "with it" then the secret is out and I don't feel like I have to try so hard anymore. 

Sometimes I fa, made to feel as though I should be embarrassed that I'm not a size 2, 4.0 student/wife, with the perfect car and perfect house, and perfect family.

Sometimes I am made to feel as thiough I should be embarrassed because I have bad days and doubt myself.

Why do I feel like that? Honestly. I don't have an answer. Why do I, a woman who knows my great and individual worth, believe , at times, that I am "less than". 

At this point you're reading this and thinking, "But you have all of these marvelous things! How can you be so negative?!" How? Because I am human. I have my days of doubt and need that to be respected. Not fixed, not waved away like it's just a silly little tantrum. Why is it so hard for us humans to NOT try to fix something? Why can't people just vent without being made to feel guilty because someone else says, "Yeah, but you have so and so "and "at least you have this and that"? 

I understand that it is a helping mechanism. We want to make someone feel better.We want to fix, lift, cheer and support. To be honest though, sometimes it just makes me feel a bazillion times worse. 

I am not excusing myself or saying that I have never done this because that would be false. I am guilty of doing this, just a disclaimer.

I love you all, but sometimes, I just have crap-tastic days and that should be okay! It should be and it is! So there!

Ha, in pondering I realize, this is not really a post that "invites" comments. But if you would like to agree or disagree with me, that is fine. Just, please, no "fixing" comments?

Why My Husband Rocks

Neil is the best thing that has ever happened in my life. I am blown away by his constant care of me. I love him and here are just a few reasons why. 

This is by no means a comprehensive list.

1. He always makes me breakfast and lunch
2. Neil is the most patient guy I know, he never gets mad
3. He'll call me to let me know when he's on his way home. 
4. He is a really great cook and he'll make dinner when I am feeling tired
5. He takes out the trash
6. I'm pretty sure he has done more laundry in our married life than I have
7. He snuggles me and helps me feel better on rough days
8. He has never failed to open the door for me, be it the car, or a building etc. 
9. He encourages me to break out of my shell and try new things
10. He humors my crazy ideas (craft kinds...)
11. Neil is the most trusting and humble man I know. He makes friends easily and is kind to everyone
12. He loves simplicity and wide open spaces
13. He watches chick flicks with me (like, You've Got Mail, Somewhere in Time, 13 Going on 30, Confessions of a Shopaholic etc.)
14. He can make me laugh and smile when nobody else can
15. Neil is a wonderful student. There are times that I see him buried in his homework that I know I would just give up but he doesn't.When he says he will do something, he does it and he does it well. 
16. He has taught me how to save money and become financially responsible
17. He loves the Lord. He loves the Gospel and the scriptures and is so good at leading our family in spiritual and temporal matters
18. He is my biggest fan.  
19. He understands that not everything is easy and that working hard is part of life. He is teaching me this more and more every day.  
20. He loves me for who I am and who I can become.

I Look To You

I Look To You

To the Mother with the unconsolable child who is tired and worn. 

I look to you. 

Not with annoyance but with admiration. 

Do not be embarrassed. 

To the Mother with piles of laundry lining her hallway, with no time to take care of it because she is entertaining her child. 

I look to you. 

Not with disgust but with respect. 

Do not feel ashamed. 

To the Wife who supports her husband while he embarks on receiving an education.

I look to you. 

Not with belittlement but with support. 

Do not feel inferior. 

To the Woman who feels alone and so desperately wants companionship.

I look to you. 

Not to diminish but to strengthen.

 Do not despair.

To the Woman who is a student and has two jobs simply so she can support herself.

I look to you. 

Not with haughty pride but with encouragement.

Do not give up. 

To the Woman who is learning what pregnancy is like with all it's highs and lows. 

I look to you. 

Not with envy but with hope. 

Do not hide. 

To the Woman who is tired.

To the Woman who is ready to quit.

To the Woman who cannot see the good qualities she possesses.

To the Woman who does not feel that she has a friend in this world. 

To the Woman who is unsure of herself. 

I look to you. 

I look with eyes that see someone who is bigger, stronger and smarter than she can ever comprehend. I look with eyes that are young and unlearned that see your experiences as a chance to learn.

I see you for who you are and who you can become.

I look to you.